24 May, Friday
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The library of essays of Proakatemia

How to be a nice human to make people like you

Kirjoittanut: Esseepankin arkisto - tiimistä Ei tiimiä.

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Esseen arvioitu lukuaika on 2 minuuttia.

Quite an old book that gives you insights on how to treat people nicely and be a good person. From being genuinely interested in other people to smiling, I found quite a resemblance between the teachings of Dale Carnegie and the Dialogue Diamond; Listen, Respect, Wait, Talk (Honestly). After reading How to Win Friends and Influence People a lot of the suggestions highlighted the four points of the Diamond. What I enjoyed about the book is understanding that a big role in Leadership is communication and listening skills.

Specially the section of How to Make People Like You, pointed out the importance of Caring and Listening to other people. Trying to understand the reasons behind their thinking and connecting their story to their opinions. I felt that that was quite a good point. Understanding where people come from, gives you a better understanding of why they are thinking that way.

On his tips on how to Be a Leader I felt the points might work, however, I would seriously take into consideration the culture of the person or the country they are from. If you consider a multicultural team not all the point would work with everyone. “Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.” This might work in Asian countries or in Latin countries but I doubt it would work in Finland. Here people are quite straight in what they say, but rather than saying it’s a mistake they say it’s a point to improve. “Let the other person save face.” Is something that is very important in Asian culture.

Overall, this book felt like a lot of learnings were quite logic or basic, it felt as if we were learning how to be good people. However, I believe that the points this book highlights are very good and are things everyone should consider. It might have been interesting if I had read this book before Proakatemia, maybe six months ago this book might have given me quite a good insight on listening and understanding other people. I feel that this time, I have had good practice following the Dialogue Diamond. That might be the main point that I will take from the book. To be able to have a dialogue with someone, it is important to Listen, Respect, Wait and Talk Honestly.

In business terms, at the end of the day, it is important to value the importance of human relationships. We need to remember that an organization is the group of people that conform it, without the people we don’t have an organization. Improving our communication and listening skills can become a true advantage in the battle field.

“People want to know they matter and they want to be treated as people. That’s the new talent contract.” – Pamela Stroko in Tanveer Naseer’s blog post How Leaders are Creating Engagement in Today’s Workplaces

  • Päivi Mayor

    This is a good essay, and I personally agree with many of your points. “Be always nice when it is possible. It is always possible” (Dalai Lama; wording may have been different)

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